Funny One Liners Jokes (2)

Funny One Liners Jokes (2)

War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.

Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

If sex is a pain in the ass, then you're doing it wrong...

Funny One Liners Jokes (2)